Top Ten Travel Peeves

10. Expense reports (read: accountants).

9. The 'Fitness Center' at the hotel is a graveyard for fitness machines, wedged in behind the icemaker.

8. The icemaker is next to my room.

7. The 'Business Center' at the hotel is a computer (no printer). The bellhop is using it.

6. Airline passengers who think they own the armrests.

5. Drivers who don't get the concept that I don't speak Spanish (or Arabic, or Burmese). No, it doesn't take fewer muscles to smile.

4. The only airport shop that takes AMEX is the Duty Free Shop. Toblerone and Bailey's for lunch, anyone?

3. People who lunge for their suitcase at the luggage carousel, almost knocking me down. C'mon folks--it's not going to the incinerator. It'll come back.

2. Odd hours. So the hotel can't do my laundry on Saturday, and can't open the restaurant on Sunday. How about the chef washes out a few t-shirts, and the laundress makes me a sandwich?

1. Getting bumped from Business Class to Coach. I don't care how many of his own people he has killed. The General shouldn't get my seat.